“I have many journals with only a handful of inked pages.”
In case you’re wondering who wrote that incredibly profound quote, it was me. Months ago when I started this blog.
Back then, I was a different person. When I imagined my year, I saw loads of free time during which I would write this blog (can I call it a blog now that there are TWO entries?), visit all of my friends, and be a real adult (i.e. get enough sleep to stop my snooze button addiction, meal prep, clean my house, etc.). I was wrong. I have been so much busier than I expected, and honestly busier than I like to be.
The second piece is that I thought I would have a much harder time with JT gone. I expected that I would use writing as a way to process and get through the tough times. Having my husband deployed is not easy, but it’s also not as difficult as I anticipated (remember, we don’t have children). Time is flying, just like my husband. At some point I am sure the time will slow down, and I will slow down, and this deployment will become much more difficult. Time
flies will tell.
Last week I was walking through a bookstore with my friend T and I mentioned this blog to her. “I just haven’t needed it,” I told her. “That’s great,” she said. Hey, if I don’t need it, I don’t need it, right?
But over the past week, I’ve been thinking. The last time I talked to my husband, he was really missing home. Days are ticking by slowly for him right now, so his time? Not flying. See, his time only flies when he does. So my thinking went like this… I may not need this right now, but maybe he does.
So, if you’re reading this, JT, I hope the minutes start to pass more quickly. I hope you laugh every day. I hope I’m the last thing you think about before you go to bed. I hope your homesickness eases but I also want you to know that I will never let you forget the time you told me you even missed my laundry mountains. Because they will be here when you get home, and so will I.
Until then, I’ll try to write more. Because at some point, we both may need it.